My wife writes a devotional every two weeks for the MOPS group at New Life Lakeview. (She's the writer of the family--people have asked her to write a devotional book. What can I say--I married up.) Here's last week's entry:
My Journey of Forgiveness
I’ve been on a journey. A journey of learning how to love and forgive. I guess I’ve probably been on this journey since I first knew what it felt like to love someone and to be loved, and to wound someone, and to be wounded by someone. Can I admit that it has been a painful journey at times?
We all know that it’s those we love most deeply that can in turn leave the deepest wounds in our soul. So, in learning to love, we must learn to forgive. The Bible is certainly not silent on the issue of forgiveness. God makes it clear that in order for us to be forgiven, we too must extend forgiveness to those who have sinned against us. (Matthew 18:34 & 35, Mark 11:25, Luke 6:37)
But the issue of forgiveness is never as black and white as we would hope. Sometimes it is – someone wounds us, genuinely repents by saying sorry, and asks to be forgiven. Other times, the wound is inflicted, time passes, and finally the offender, mostly out of obligation gives a lame apology in hopes of pacifying the situation. Still other times, we are wounded, and the offender refuses to repent or perhaps the offender doesn’t seek repentance during his or her lifetime, and we are left with an unresolved wound.
As I’ve wrestled with each of these different issues, I’ve screamed, cried, pounded fists, and at times, demanded that God bring justice. One thing my husband has helped me to understand (as we’ve fought things out over the years) is that forgiveness is never deserved, even though God requires it. Something I’ve been learning more recently is that while forgiveness makes it possible for our hearts to heal, it doesn’t insure that relationships stay the same. I think I’ve been confused about that for a long time, and am finding peace in knowing that forgiveness can sometimes mean loving by releasing and letting go.
I’m still on a journey. I’m not claiming to have all the answers in regard to forgiveness, but I think I’m beginning to learn what it means to extend genuine forgiveness that ultimately frees the heart from bitterness.
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